User Tag List

Page 1 of 4 1234 LastLast
Results 1 to 15 of 57
  1. #1
    The Resident Shopaholic susieq's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2007
    Posts
    944
    Post Thanks / Like
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default Speaking of break-ups... I need help

    Here's a bit of a story. I went to the Hamptons/Montauk for holiday with 3 of my very close girlfriends. We had TONS of fun! On Friday night while we were there, I ended up talking and befriending these two guys from London (actually...they are Australian but live in London). One of them was pretty good looking and extremely funny. So as we were leaving the bar, I gave him my business card with my cell phone # on it. I figured...what the heck! If he never ever contacts me again, no skin off my back. Ya know?

    Well the next day he sends me a text message asking to hang out on the beach. I didn't feel like staying on the beach longer (we would get up at 8am and sun bathe till noon, he texted me at 1pm). So I asked if he wanted to go to the bars with us. That night rolls around and me and the girls are bar-hopping. We get to this one bar that is INSANE - so many beautiful people. So I text the guy and tell him how him and his friend should come because "there are tons of hot girls". Figuring...maybe he wasn't interested in me but just looking for someone to hang out with. He writes me back "okay well heaps of hot girls are nice but I was actually only looking forward to seeing one girl, and that's you". Oh...okay wow I blushed for sure.

    We end up finally meeting at a bar which just so happens to be called "Memory Motel". Yep...cheesy right?!?! Already my girlfriends have bets placed on if I'll make out with him or not. I was really set against it - seriously. Until...I saw him. He cleaned up REAL nice. Smell delicious and was completely infactuated with me!!! My friends all melted at the sight. We were hanging out and having fun - he kept complimenting me and just grabbing me. It was kind of hot, I got to admit!!

    So finally he was like "so i need to leave soon, got a flight back to london" and I'm like "well..so?" and he's like "So, I want to kiss you". And I started laughing and said "no, not at the MEMORY MOTEL!". He grabbed my hand and took me to the back and just began the HOTTEST make-out I've had in a LONG time. My friends told me they couldn't stop staring because they were all so envious. They said it looked like a movie scene. Hahaha. Then he's like "come back to my room" and I'm like "HAH no way, I'm NOT that slutty american girl you can just bang and go back to your mates to tell" and he looked at me all surprised and said "no...NO NO NO I wouldn't have sex! I barely know you...I'm not like that". So I didn't go to his room, we kept it clean. I went to talk to my friends for a bit and then I saw him talking to another girl. The strangest thing... she ended up seeing me, ran over to me and said "OH darling, this boy has been looking for you all over, he lost you and is just CRAZY about you!!!".

    Before he left for the night - he kept telling me how he wants me to visit him in London and how "did you ever see the movie Notting Hill?" and I'm like "no.." and he's like "well I live right there, you need to see!".

    That was that...he left, I left. Back to our own lives right? Well I figured I'd never hear from him again but... 3 days later he texted me again asking how I was and then emailed me! So I've been a little "distracted".

    Mind you girls... I am in a 2 year relationship, I live with my boyfriend and he's crazy about me. However, I'm 23 and he's 28. He wants to marry me. I'm terrified. I want to move back to NYC, he says he can't possibly live there EVER. I am in the fashion industry, that's where my center is!!!

    This "summer fling" had brought me to the idea that...I'm so young and I'm not ready to be married or feel like I'm a house wife. Not yet!! I need to be back in the city - but then I was given a warning that if I moved back to NYC - we would be separated. I love my boyfriend but I also love my freedom. Also, as my friends pointed out, since I was 16, I've never been single for more than 3 months!!! ACK!! That's pretty wild huh?

    I need help...I love my boyfriend to death but I know if I don't get to be back in NYC and I don't get time on my own, we might never make it. I would hate to get married and then years down the road feel the same way and make a terrible decision!!!!

  2. #2
    ♥'s RM Jess's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2007
    Posts
    11,434
    Post Thanks / Like
    Mentioned
    2 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default Re: Speaking of break-ups... I need help

    Well, to be honest...making out with some guy wouldn't be a decision I would have made...you sort of betrayed your boyfriend. If you want to be single and have fun...you should tell your boyfriend so you're not like, leading him on. But if you really love your bf you should talk to him about seriously moving to NYC with you (if that's what you want).

  3. #3
    Official Bagista
    Join Date
    Mar 2008
    Location
    Tennessee
    Posts
    1,581
    Post Thanks / Like
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default Re: Speaking of break-ups... I need help

    you should follow your heart and not be someone youre not

    Did the Aussie know you were in a relationship? Also how would you feel if the roles were reversed and it was your boyfriend acting that way?

    This is a hard decision but follow your heart...

  4. #4
    ♥'s RM Jess's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2007
    Posts
    11,434
    Post Thanks / Like
    Mentioned
    2 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default Re: Speaking of break-ups... I need help

    Yeah, Susie...follow your heart! If you do move to NYC without your bf and if he truly does want to marry you, he'll hopefully follow!

  5. #5
    The Asian Sensation
    Join Date
    Jan 2008
    Location
    Newport Coast, Ca.
    Posts
    1,942
    Post Thanks / Like
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default Re: Speaking of break-ups... I need help

    I like Jess's Advice ...Good job Jess!

    No offence Susie, BUt umm...WTF!! Why are you making out with another dude when you have a BF?! You still have a BF regardless of the situation you're in until you guys break up.

  6. #6
    Vintage Lover lilstrlett's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2008
    Location
    Brooklyn
    Posts
    5,982
    Post Thanks / Like
    Mentioned
    1 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default Re: Speaking of break-ups... I need help

    Haha sorry susie but I'm with the rest of them. If you really loved your bf then you wouldn't have made out with another guy. I live with my boyfriend, we've been together for 2 years, he's only a year older than me, we're moving to NYC in January, and we've talked about getting married, too. But, I love him more than anything, and I would never even look at another guy thinking "Oooh that guy is hot, I want to flirt with him." I'm not judging you in any way, I just think that you're heart's not in your relationship, and I think you should take this whole experience as a sign that you're not supposed to be with the guy you're with.

    I think that if you cheat on someone, regardless of how innocent it is, it shows that you're not really into the person you're with, no matter how much you tell yourself that you are.
    Mrs. Lawson
    7-16-11

  7. #7
    Official Bagista
    Join Date
    Mar 2008
    Location
    Tennessee
    Posts
    1,581
    Post Thanks / Like
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default Re: Speaking of break-ups... I need help

    ^^lils hit the nail on the head... Youre just not that in to him.

    I dont think youre a bad person or anything... I just think you need to do what you want in life before settling down.

  8. #8
    *The TBF Elite* Maeveyblue's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2008
    Location
    Perpetual Bliss...
    Posts
    3,512
    Post Thanks / Like
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default Re: Speaking of break-ups... I need help

    Susie,
    The relationship is over. Your heart and mind are both telling you what you need to do. And it isn't fair to your bf, who is looking for a life long relationship, to pretend it didn't happen.
    My advice.. come clean with him and tell him why you did what you did. If he loves you, he'll understand and maybe you can work through this. If not, it's meant to be that way.
    You are young. And he is ready to settle down. My suggestion is to move to NYC and follow your dream. You'll be angry and bitter if you don't.
    I'm having flash backs of when I was 22 and moved to NYC. I left my bf, but we had talked about how he would attend med school at Columbia. He came out to visit me, hated it and we split. I was miserable for a bit, but after I moved on, I saw it was for the best. If we hadn't broken up, I wouldn't have traveled the path I did and wound up where I am today. I truly beleive God puts people in our lives, at certain times, for a reason. You need to focus on what you learned from this relationship and then be okay to move forward.
    Thinking of...
    Chanel Black Jumbo
    LV Artsy MM
    Holy Grail: Chanel 06 Bleu Fonce Jumbo


    In the middle of every difficulty lies opportunity."
    ~Einstein~

  9. #9
    Vintage Lover lilstrlett's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2008
    Location
    Brooklyn
    Posts
    5,982
    Post Thanks / Like
    Mentioned
    1 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default Re: Speaking of break-ups... I need help

    I agree with ND, I don't think you're a bad person either.

    I think everyone at some point has kissed another boy (or girl for Guy), when they were in a relationship with someone. It could have been when you were 17 or 30, if you're not into the person you're with, your actions and thoughts always let you know.
    Mrs. Lawson
    7-16-11

  10. #10
    Totally Purse Obsessed Alicia's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2008
    Location
    Shoreline, CT
    Posts
    2,067
    Post Thanks / Like
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default Re: Speaking of break-ups... I need help

    the fact that you made out with another guy while you're in a relationship with someone else has already made the decision for you. if you really loved the guy you're with, you wouldn't have gone through with kissing the other dude. i mean, talking and flirting are one thing. i still do the same, but it's just for fun and that's it - there is no getting physical or kissing, or whatever. i could never do that, even if i was having second thoughts about my boyfriend because, i'm sorry susie (and don't hate me), but that is cheating. like the other girls said., how would you feel if your bf did the same thing to you. you have to reverse the roll.

    at the same time, i understand that you're still very young and that you love your freedom. and if moving to NYC is what you want with your life, then you should do it. given that you just made out with another guy and that your bf can't even make that sacrafice for you (moving to NYC), then perhaps you two aren't meant for each other. also, look at the fact that you've been "warned" that you two will be seperated, or i should say broken up since seperated applies to married couples (and you are not), if you move to NY. what does that tell you right there?

    anyways, you're not a bad person for what you did. you're still young and just need to find exactly what it is that you want. in the end, you have to do what's best for you. so, have you talked to him yet? what are you leaning towards - breaking up and moving to NYC or staying with him?
    Wishlist: * LV Vernis Alma PM or Brea MM * LV Mono Speedy 35 * Medium YSL Y-Mail Tote *

  11. #11
    Moderator/Blogger VivaLaJuicy's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2006
    Location
    Texas
    Posts
    11,814
    Post Thanks / Like
    Mentioned
    40 Post(s)
    Tagged
    1 Thread(s)

    Default Re: Speaking of break-ups... I need help

    Awww... SUsie, don't hate us for giving you honest opinions... but...

    I liked the whole story, UNTIL... I read the two year relationship with the Boyfriend Part! I dislike the fact that you kissed the European guy... nothing wrong with kissing a guy, its just that you are in a serious relationship. Its unfair for your boyfriend. I would come clean with him... and then decide whether you want to continue your relationship... or if you want to go ahead and discover you've been missing out on. Your still young... very young... its just that it seems like serious relationships are extremely rare to find now-a-days. Just my two cents.

  12. #12
    \(^.^)/ Jennifer's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2005
    Posts
    27,998
    Post Thanks / Like
    Follow Jennifer On Twitter Add Jennifer on Facebook
    Mentioned
    66 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default Re: Speaking of break-ups... I need help

    Susie - susie - susie. I'm sorry to say this, but I agree with everyone else on here.. you kissed another dude?!! Do you have an open relationship with your bf or something? Hmm.. so does this summer fling guy know you have a bf? One that you live with?

  13. #13
    The Bag Star jadore's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2007
    Location
    So Cal
    Posts
    819
    Post Thanks / Like
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default Re: Speaking of break-ups... I need help

    Susie,
    I'm sorry, but I have to agree with everyone here..
    The relationship is over. You need to come clean with him, he deserves the truth. And it's better for yourself too, you don't want to keep that inside of you and regret a decision you'll make future-wise. You're still young, you deserve your "you" time! I'm sure you'll make the right decision..


    WISHLIST.*

    MbyMJ Pedal To The Metal Flap Pouchette in Newsprint
    Michael Kors Fulton Flats
    Rock and Republic Skinny Jeans



  14. #14
    I am now LVholicmum juicyholicmum's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2008
    Location
    Land down under
    Posts
    3,013
    Post Thanks / Like
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default Re: Speaking of break-ups... I need help

    Hey Susie, I'm sorry as well but I'm with the girls... I think at the back of your mind you're convincing yourself that the relationship won't work anymore... The story WAS great with the Aussie dude, but seeing this, you might only have been caught in a sort of "whirlwind romance" and still hasn't recovered from it...

    You're still young and if you want to move to NYC go ahead, and it's true that if he really loves you he'll make the sacrifice and move there with you... I got married at 22 but just because I know I'm ready and I know my DH is the one, if you're not ready to settle down then don't, it's not something you can spit out when it gets too much to take... I know that when I got married, I've done everything I want in my life and settling down with my DH is the right puece of the puzzle. And yea, I didn't want to leave my country (where my family and friends were) but my husband's life is here in Australia, so I moved down here and sacrificed, to start a new life with him.

  15. #15
    Official Bagista
    Join Date
    Mar 2008
    Location
    Tennessee
    Posts
    1,581
    Post Thanks / Like
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default Re: Speaking of break-ups... I need help

    I talked to my husband about this. He said that every person, put in the right situation with the right circumstances has the potential to be unfaithful. That said, when you are in a relationship and you want it to work, you have to make sure that you don't put yourself in any comprimising positions.
    By allowing yourself into the situation, there was no way that what happened wouldn't have happened. The only way it would have never happened would be if you had never gave him your card.

    If you want it to work, have an honest heart to heart with your boyfriend. You may be suprised at how good it feels to be honest and straight forward. Maybe your lives are moving in different directions now, but later on they might join again. Or, you might go your separate ways and meet some other awesome guy who totally rocks your world.

    Good luck, keep us informed and please don't think we think anything bad of you -it could have happened to ANY of us.

Page 1 of 4 1234 LastLast

Thread Information

Users Browsing this Thread

There are currently 1 users browsing this thread. (0 members and 1 guests)

Tags for this Thread

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •