Thread: gotta help me out

ok this is about boyfriend issues

this all started a while ago i was at my bfs house and i noticed a pic of a girl on his dresser and i asked him about it he said oh i guess my mom put it there i dont talk to her anymore i used to talk to her in a chat room then he threw out the pic i believed him

now right around the holidays he was on my comp and he left to go home and he was still signed in to myspace when i snooped around his myspace page

I KNOW I WAS WRONG FOR DOING THIS BUT I COULDNT HELP IT

but there was a message from the girl in his inbox it was a pic of her in a slutty mrs. claus outfit and he responded thanks for the pic my holiday is complete now
i was so upset so i decided.....NOW I KNOW I AM WRONG AGAIN
i deleted her and some few random people(so it didnt seem odd) off his profile cuz i wanted to see if he would add her again

AND HE DID
SO THEY DEF TALK
i figured i should not worry about it cuz her profile says she is from virgina but you can always lie about that

so i have no clue what to do my boyfriend seems kinda distant latly and i worry that he may me cheating becuause he doent work now and he has all day to do nothing

i never thought i would post this here but i feel like i have nobody to talk to all of my cloest friends dont have boyfriends

Hmm... lies...might be cheating... doesn't have a job... sounds like a winner!

im glad im not the only one who posted a bf issue...lol princess, i totally support you and please dont feel like you have no one to talk to. everyone here at tbf is wonderful...just read what i posted and you will see how understanding and caring these girls really are. you have plenty of honest, sincere people to talk to here, ok?

Sorry Hun... that's def. a cheater! Why don't you confront him??? OMG... sooo many people are having relationship problems... I just got off the phone w/ my crying sister as well... Anyways, confront him and ask him about her!!!!

well i am continuing my investagative work i want to make sure 100 percent without a doubt have all the evidence i need cuz i dont want to seen like an idiot cuz i snooped on his account

if he lies?? he's a cheater. i don't care what anyone says but BF + doing anything with another girl = cheating...

well i must say my second job should be a detective i know his myspace password now i know im bad nothing on there today to make me upset lol

I wouldn't go so far as to say that this is evidence that he's cheating, for sure. BUT, there are obviously some trust problems in your relationship. You should ask yourself if you are transferring mistrust from experiences with other people in your past, or if this guy has given you a real reason not to trust him. True, it's pretty uncool of him to be chatting with some girl who is disreputable enough to send slutty pictures of herself to men in committed relationships, but he might just be a naive guy who doesn't take it seriously and is a little flattered by the attention. But, you've also been doing a bit of snooping and the gravity of these little lapses in judgment might just balance out. All I'm saying is, this could all be a very innocent misunderstanding, or it could be a seriously damaged relationship.

Consider if you are prone to mistrust because of your past; did someone cheat on you? You might need to come to terms with your own fears for the sake of your relationship. Consider his past. Has he cheated before? I am a believer of the "once a cheater, always a cheater" rule.

Take care of yourself, and we are here for you as well!