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  1. #1
    Rising Bag Star
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    Default probably a stupid topic...

    i need to know what you think about my bf and his myspace. on his mysapce, it says "in a relationship" but his profile still says "i am single and i live alone." and he also still has his email posted in case if anyone wants to hit him up. he doesnt mention anything about me in his profile, but there is a pic of us in his album. he says that he still says hes single just for fun, to see if any girls would be interested in him. is this normal? and then i went on his page and i saw that he added these really hot girls and i asked him about it and he started to laugh right in my face. he said that he added them on purpose to see how insecure i am and how long it would take me to see that he added them. am i being too paranoid? i just thought that we were way beyond all of this being that i live in his house...maybe i am just too sensitive...please dont be annoyed with me. i just really need your opinion. thanks.

  2. #2
    Hello! LikityKity's Avatar
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    Default Re: probably a stupid topic...

    • Your boyfriend is playing mind games with you.
    • It's NOT normal.
    • It has nothing to do with you, or anything being wrong with you!
    • He is either very immature, or he is a cruel person. You said he is 10 years older than you are, so I bet it's probably a mixture of both.


    Please, get out of that house! Run, don't walk away from this guy. It might hurt for a minute, but any tears you shed over this guy are wasted. You're going to look back on this time in your life and wish you hadn't spent any time with that jerk, so the sooner you end it the better.

    I am concerned for you, I don't like to hear about anyone going through this. I've been there too! Don't get any deeper into this hurtful relationship. You deserve and can have better! Keep us posted, good luck!

  3. #3
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    Default Re: probably a stupid topic...

    Quote Originally Posted by LikityKity View Post
    • Your boyfriend is playing mind games with you.
    • It's NOT normal.
    • It has nothing to do with you, or anything being wrong with you!
    • He is either very immature, or he is a cruel person. You said he is 10 years older than you are, so I bet it's probably a mixture of both.


    Please, get out of that house! Run, don't walk away from this guy. It might hurt for a minute, but any tears you shed over this guy are wasted. You're going to look back on this time in your life and wish you hadn't spent any time with that jerk, so the sooner you end it the better.

    I am concerned for you, I don't like to hear about anyone going through this. I've been there too! Don't get any deeper into this hurtful relationship. You deserve and can have better! Keep us posted, good luck!
    so, what exactly isnt normal about it. i mean it did make sense when he said that he wanted to keep his single status just to see if any girls would be interested...but is does say "in a relationship". and the part where he added those hot girls to see if i checked hi profile...thats not normal either? one time he told me that me living in his house is an "interview process" to see if im the one for him.

    i need help in understanding all of this because i think i am just blinded by my feelings for him.... btw, my dad says hes immature and he cannot stand him...he basically said everything you did...i just dont know what to do....
    Last edited by purse-aholic*; March 25th, 2007 at 10:24 AM.

  4. #4
    Moderator/Blogger VivaLaJuicy's Avatar
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    Default Re: probably a stupid topic...

    ^^^^ Very Very true... and absolutely agree with Likitykity... honey, you don't deserve a guy like this.....

  5. #5
    Hello! LikityKity's Avatar
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    Default Re: probably a stupid topic...

    People in healthy relationships don't present themselves as single just to "see if anyone is interested." That means that he needs and ego boost from other people because he's insecure, and it means that he is openly looking for an opportunity to be with someone he thinks would be better than you are. Normal is being considerate of your partner's feelings and talking with him/her if you are feeling insecure. He knows that doing this hurts you, and he doesn't care.

    People in healthy relationships don't cohabit as an "interview process." Living together complicates everything, financially, physically and emotionally. It's a step you take when you are certain that your relationship is stable enough to take to a more serious level. What happens if he deems you unworthy and decides he doesn't want to "invterview" you anymore? You have to gather up your life and move again. That's a big pain in the @ss.

    And adding hot girls to his Myspace to make you jealous is childish and mean. This is a typical mind-game, he's playing with your emotions. And he's admitting it! He doesn't make any excuses or say that they are really his friends. He flat out told you that he was testing your insecurity!

    I think you already know that all of those things aren't right, but you're asking because you want more opinions/support. I don't know what you're getting out of this relationship that makes you stay, but I know that by being single, you would be hurting less.

    And in most cases, if your father doesn't like a man you're with, you should trust him!!!

    So here's what you do: pack your things up, tell this guy you're leaving, and move back to where ever you were before. Call your dad and ask him to pick you up and help you move, if you need to. If you think he might be dangerous, call your dad and move your stuff out while the boyfriend isn't around. He will try to manipulate you to keep you from leaving, but hold your ground! That's just what guys like him do.

  6. #6
    i love myself bagluvah's Avatar
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    Default Re: probably a stupid topic...

    you know what, please don't get mad at me or anything coz i've been through hurtful relationships, but, you are totally not loving yourself anymore and your self-respect is diminishing. it's not normal for a guy who's in a relationship to say "oh, i just wanna know if they will hit up on me" yada-yada.. if he truly loves you, its just only you and no one else....

  7. #7
    Moderator and Blogger boysRsmelly's Avatar
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    Default Re: probably a stupid topic...

    Okay, sweetie... why on Earth do you keep asking us for advice or opinions when you're not really listening to what we are telling you? It has to be obvious to you that your relationship isn't healthy... otherwise you wouldn't be asking us such things. So what is it about this guy that makes you think you need to be with him? I'm just trying to understand the situation here... help us out a little bit.

  8. #8
    i love myself bagluvah's Avatar
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    Default Re: probably a stupid topic...

    Quote Originally Posted by boysRsmelly View Post
    Okay, sweetie... why on Earth do you keep asking us for advice or opinions when you're not really listening to what we are telling you? It has to be obvious to you that your relationship isn't healthy... otherwise you wouldn't be asking us such things. So what is it about this guy that makes you think you need to be with him? I'm just trying to understand the situation here... help us out a little bit.
    i was thinking the same thing too.... but i don't wanna offend her or something... know what i mean?

  9. #9
    Moderator and Blogger boysRsmelly's Avatar
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    Default Re: probably a stupid topic...

    Quote Originally Posted by angelthelson View Post
    i was thinking the same thing too.... but i don't wanna offend her or something... know what i mean?
    I don't want to offend her either... but she should understand why I'm asking the question. I hope... LOL!

  10. #10
    i love myself bagluvah's Avatar
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    Default Re: probably a stupid topic...

    yeah, i know but oh well we're just here to offer our insights... whatever she decides on, we'll be happy for her...

  11. #11
    Moderator and Blogger boysRsmelly's Avatar
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    Default Re: probably a stupid topic...

    Quote Originally Posted by angelthelson View Post
    yeah, i know but oh well we're just here to offer our insights... whatever she decides on, we'll be happy for her...
    Oh, of course! But I want HER to be happy too... and I'm not so sure that will happen if she stays in this situation.

  12. #12
    Moderator/Blogger VivaLaJuicy's Avatar
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    Default Re: probably a stupid topic...

    Yeah... no offense or anything, but what is it about this guy that you can put up with so much and still be w/ him?

  13. #13
    *The TBF Elite* Marissa806's Avatar
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    Default Re: probably a stupid topic...

    OMG... my EX EX use to do that to me!! He was 9 1/2 years older than me and his myspace said SINGLE.. and I was always catching him leaving comments on girls pages especially the half naked girls. Never put pictures or anything about me on his profile. He always told me "You are so insecure and I just don't want my fans to know I have a GF"... he was also in the entertainment industry. Come to find out... he was lying to me. Anytime a fan came into town he would go "visit" them... talk to them on the phone and computer... would go on dates with girls behind my back... he was a total player and used his so called fame as a way to get more and more girls. I've been through that/..... myspace is evil when you are in a relationship... but it's the way I found out a lot of my info. And my gut was right the whole time... he was lying and cheating on me with girls from MYSPACE!

    This probably doesn't help at all... I'm sorry.. but it's a true story. And we talked about marriage... I thought it was a serious relationship and it wasn't at ALL.

    After that incident... I won't date anyone unless he has some kind of big status. I can't relate to the normal guys... they don't understand the entertainment industry at ALL!!! Most regular guys won't have it ...of you only getting to see them on your spare time... since you are in the recording studio for 12 hours straight sometimes. Last BF I just broke up with... was a Sports Caster... that was a mistake too!!

    No dating for me for a while.. unless it's Justin Timberlake or Derek Jeter of course! LOL...

  14. #14
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    Default Re: probably a stupid topic...

    i dont at all feel offended, but you have to understand that it is not easy to just leave because i care for him. i think im still with him because i feel like there is something there...i mean, he has never lived with a girl before and that alone was a big first step for him. and he always says how he sees potential for us to get married someday. i feel like we have a special connection, ya know? and after all the fights we are still together...doesnt that mean something??? and i am insecure about my weight right now and i feel like i cant find anyone else. if this was 2 years ago when i was thin, i would have said "f*ck you" a long time ago because i would be more secure. but for right now, i feel like he is doing me a favor by being with me since i gained a little weight. and as for the thing with myspace....i really was hurt by that and if i mention anything about him changing his profile....FORGET IT... he will get a 'tude and be mad at me and just say how myspace doesnt mean anything. my dad keeps telling me to pack my stuff and come home. but i really do love him and i cant let go of that. i appreciate all of your advice and please dont feel like it was wasted because i am still with him. all of you have made me feel a lot better about myself...thank you.

  15. #15
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    Default Re: probably a stupid topic...

    listen to Likitykity.

    Do you really think if one of these girls presents herself to him that he will stay true to you?

    Always remember that you are special and hold your head up high. True love will come.

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